Crushed Optimists

We are twin brothers who grew up in Central Washington. This blog is devoted to the life of Seattle sports fans, as well as various other topics that we will espouse for your enjoyment. We could be called another OFFICIAL SEATTLE SEAHAWKS site, but we'll take our uneducated crack at the Mariners, Sonics, and Huskies as well. A Seattle Sports Blog? Must be the land... of crushed optimism!

Friday, November 10, 2006

The Scientific Method: Week 10

Oh..... my....... science......

A huge hat-tip to South Park for a hugely entertaining couple of episodes, except, of course, for showing us Ms. (Mr.) Garrison having sex. That was terrible.

A huge hat-tip to Bill Simmons. It only took Brady throwing four interceptions against the Colts to make him realize that, yes, the Pats would miss Deion Branch.

Yes, this NFL season has turned predictably wacky, with the Lions and 49ers actually winning on probably the only week that I didn't pick either of them to win. Go me! What does week 10 have in store for us?

Baltimore at Tennessee
Baltimore is one of the toughest teams for me to root for in the league. I hate Brian Billick, I hate Richard Neuheisal with a passion for ruining the Dawgs, and I hate how everyone hypes love onto Ray Lewis after he was involved in another person's death. On the other hand, I'm a big fan of Jeff Fisher (who called Haynesworth his "defensive tackle"), Vince Young has his moments, and the Titans seem to be learning how to play the game of football. However, it is hard to imagine the Titans offense not giving away a couple of huge turnovers that allow that mediocre Ravens offense a couple of scores. By the way, I love how everyone is talking about how the Ravens are 2-0 since Billick took over the play-calling. Did the offense win the game for them last week? Negatory.
Scientific Pick: Baltimore

Buffalo at Indianapolis
Willis McGahee is out, meaning that the Buffalo offense will go completely through one JP Losman, which should scare people from northern New York. Indy still has a ridiculous offense and a ridiculously bad rushing defense, and I know (I KNOW) that they will not end the season undefeated. However, unless someone can tell me how the Bills would score more points then the Colts (outside of Peyton pulling a Grossman and tossing 4-5 interceptions), I just can't do it.
Scientific Pick: Indy

Cleveland at Atlanta
Hmmmm. As always, this game hinges on one Michael Vick. Super in some games, absolutely terrible in others, Vick is, and always will be, an enigma. Who I am starting in fantasy football this week. Actually, not many people are talking about this, but the Falcons fast start was also buoyed by a fantastic performance by that defense, which has become rather invisible in recent weeks. Cleveland, by the way, has started playing folks tough, including San Diego last week until a final push by LT took away all hope. I am seriously tempted to do something stupid.
Scientific Pick: Cleveland

Green Bay at Minnesota
I finally put my trust in Brett Favre, and he reverts to last season. I finally put my trust in Brad Johnson, and he remembers that he is 68 years old. This is ridiculous. However, the one side of the football FOR EITHER TEAM that looks potentially elite is the Minny defense, who should easily get a few picks tossed their way by Favre, while Chester Taylor continues his strong play. Yes, the Vikings climb back above .500.
Scientific Pick: Minnesota

Houston at Jacksonville
Honestly, I don't understand the quarterback controversy in Jacksonville. In my opinion, NEITHER quarterback appears to be all-world, but Leftwich has the upside in talent and zip on the football. However, Garrard has that "escapability" and "desire to win" that I'm always hearing about. Maybe, um, Jacksonville won those last two games because of DOMINANT performances by that defense, eh? I should know. My fantasy team has enjoyed it. As for you, Houston, that was a winnable game that you let slip away in New York last week. You hold the Giants to 14 points, you should get a win. Easy.
Scientific Pick: Jacksonville

Kansas City at Miami
Miami won on Sunday because of three reasons, which I will list in ascending order....
3. Jascon Taylor was a monster
2. Ronnie Brown was a monster
1. Rex Grossman decided that a perfect season wasn't for him

Do not tell me that Joey Harrington won that game for them, or even that the Miami performance is repeatable. You know what's repeatable? Larry Johnson running for 150 yards like every week the past four weeks, making the job of Damon Huard super duper easy because he knows he has single-coverage on a Tony Gonzalez or an Eddie Kennison. That KC offense is in sync right now, and should continue to be through Sunday.
Scientific Pick: Kansas City

NY Jets at New England
Bill Simmons is picking the Jets to win, just like he did earlier in the season when the Pats visited the Jets. The Jets played the Pats tough, but once again, I can't see the talent differential playing out any different way. The Pats will run all over the Jets, and the Jets won't be able to run. That's all the difference. Oh, and by the way. Thank you, New England, for Deion Branch. Thank you. Have fun with Reche Caldwell. Did you see Brady on Sunday night? Every pass was going to Kevin Faulk or Ben Watson. The wide receiving corps was almost nonexistant, especially in clutch-time.
Scientific Pick: New England

San Diego at Cincinnati
If there is one team that has been killing my picks on a weekly basis, it has been the Bengals, a team that I honestly thought would challenge for the Super Bowl. Instead, they are on the brink of imploding. Now, we said the exact same thing about the Giants earlier in the season, but the Bengals have a few more turds than the G-Men. And what's the Bengals main weakness? Defending the run. Hmmmm. What's the huge strength of the Chargers? Running the football. I expect to see a very similar game to the one between the Pats and Bengals earlier in the season.
Scientific Pick: San Diego

San Francisco at Detroit
Ha! I HAVE to pick one of them to win this week. God has forced my hand, telling me that it was foolish to disregard both of them last week. I am a foolish mortal, indeed. Should I go with the team that scored 9 points to beat the Vikings last week? Should I go with, in the words of Roy Williams, the best 2-6 team of all time? Decisions, decisions. Well, shee-oot. When in doubt, go with the veteran quarterback over the up-and-comer, which means that I am sticking with Kitna, a revitalized Keven Jones, and that awe-inspiring (yes, sarcasm) Detroit defense.
Scientific Pick: Detroit

Washington at Philadelphia
Washington should have lost that game to Dallas in about fifteen different places last week, highlighted by T.O.'s dropped pass and the blocked field goal by Vanderjagt. Philly has lost a few of those sort of games this season, highlighted by Eli Manning's comeback and the 62 yard field goal by Matt Bryant in Tampa Bay. Basically, what I'm trying to say is that one of these teams should be 2-6, while the other team should be 6-2. Which team do you think I will be picking to win?
Scientific Pick: Philly

Denver at Oakland
There is nothing more to write about how bad the Oakland offense is. Their ineptitude rivals my love of all things war-related. Art Shell has responded by saying that they will be working on becoming more balanced. That's an excellent decision. Spread out the suckitude, Art, letting it seep through all facets of the team. Oh, and don't forget to have someone attempt to knee Javon Walker in the nads, ok? Personally, I didn't mind Brayton doing that, mostly because the recipient was Jerramy Stevens, who lost his nads a loooooooong time ago.
Scientific Pick: Denver

Dallas at Arizona
Tony Romo hasn't looked that bad the last two weeks, leading the Boys to a nice win over the Panthers and a should-of win (though they lost) over the Redskins. Arizona, on the other hand, has looked terrible after that loss on Monday night. It's like the entire team, especially the offense, just laid down and said, "We know who we thought we were. We're the Arizona Cardinals." Matt Leinart, in particular, has just looked awful, though having no running game hasn't helped. Just wondering. You have, on the same team, Matt Leinart, Edgerrin James, Anquan Boldin, Bryant Johnston, Leonard Pope, etc. How does this offense not score points?
Scientific Pick: Dallas

New Orleans at Pittsburgh
Big Ben threw for over 400 yards last week. That's right. 400 yards. The Steelers should have whupped the Broncos last Sunday, just as they should have whupped the Raiders, and the Falcons, and so forth. Willie Parker finally called the team out, saying that they just didn't care because they had their rings. I agree. I mean, how do you even WEAR those rings when you start the next season 2-6? What are you, a champion? Are you kidding me? Here's a prediction, and take it how you will. The Pittsburgh Steelers aren't just going to win on Sunday. No, the Pittsburgh Steelers are going to destroy the New Orleans Saints.
Scientific Pick: Pittsburgh

St. Louis at Seattle
A win here would basically cement the NFC West for Seattle. In theory. Unfortunately, you know the Rams will score points, since Tory Holt owns us, Isaac Bruce owns, us, Marc Bulger owns us, etc., etc. On the flip side, Mo Morris owns no one, Seneca Wallace ditto, and Tom Ashworth ditto. This would actually be an upset win for the Seahawks, winning this game without several of their best players. Couple that with the fact that I'm a wuss, but I really don't see how we win this game on Sunday.
Scientific Pick: St. Louis

Chicago at NY Giants
What a great game. This is what NBC wanted when it got the optional games in the second half of the season. Otherwise you might be stuck with Washington/Philly, or Cleveland/Atlanta. A couple keys here. First, the Giants are missing their pass rush, which is what rattles Rex Grossman and turns him into a turnover machine. That will hurt. Second, Brian Urlacher won't be playing at 100%, and Tiki Barber should be able to exploit what Ronnie Brown did the week before. However, if there is one thing that the Bears are great at, it's creating turnovers, and Eli Manning loves to oblige. In my mind, that's the difference in the game. Right there.
Scientific Pick: Chicago

Tampa Bay at Carolina
Buh. Which game is better, Sunday or Monday night? Not going to waste my time here.
Scientific Pick: Carolina

posted by colin_hesse @ 10:29 AM  0 comments


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